Lady Gaga can die and go to hell

Being a nerd has hidden, dark qualities that interfere with life. My gravitational pull often sucks in mundane things like statistics and computation into subjects nobody is asking to be thought of in such a manner. My fixation will not end until I see a percentage of some sort and I feel like I learned something nobody has before. I don’t feel better about myself when I am through as much as I’m satisfied to complete the task.

The subject this time is The Queen of Zeitgeist, Lady Gaga.

The young lady behind the makeup has become a one-woman wrecking ball of entertainment. Sure, she has a gigantic team consisting of press, hair, makeup, wardrobe, PR, dancers, musicians, and travel…but if she doesn’t perform exactly right for her 90 minutes, everything would fall apart. While this is “rock n’roll” and her insane tour schedule is grueling (more on that later), one aspect of her, well, entire career I have an issue with is the one thing that makes this entire circus possible: money.


Mz. Stefani Joanne Angelina Germanotta is one tough broad. Being thrust into the spotlight after trying for many years to even be noticed takes some backbone to survive. The amount of press and public life exposed would drain the toughest person, let alone a controversial figure who embodies both dialoge and disgust. Her two most recent tours are products of both her controversy and her hard work, but, more than anything, they are products of efficiency and return on investment.

First off, the following data was comprised using data found via Billboard.com and Wikipedia. While I would love to get into the justification for Wikipedia as a valid form of research, I will sum it up thusly: Knowledge gains power when more people can shape the “truth” and discuss its validity.

Up first is her initial gigantic tour, dubbed the “Fame Ball.” This was a seven month excursion that took her literally all over the world, just check out the breakdown of performances in a month.

Mar – 14
april – 6
may – 13
june – 4
july – 22
aug – 11
sep – 2

This means 72 out of 201 nights ended up in a Gaga performance, which is about 36%. The venues were smaller than the ones she plays now, as the box office data shows, giving her a 99.8% sellout rate across the eight shows we have data for. The data also shows a total gross revenue of $347,862 for those eight shows that house about 1,000-3,000 fans per show.

Now check out her latest tour, entitled “The Monster Ball,” which started in November of 2009 and IS STILL GOING ON:

Nov – 3
dec – 18
jan – 13
feb – 7
mar- 14
apr – 9
may – 15
jun – 4
jul – 18
aug – 15
sep – 10
oct – 9
nov – 15
dec – 10
jan – 0
feb – 6
march – 18
april – 14
may – 3

Barring any injury, natural disasters, or lack of egg vehicles, she’s on pace to increase her performance rate to 39% (201 shows out of 525 days).

Sadly, she also jacked up her ticket prices.

Take, for instance, her L.A. performances: the first was at The Wiltern, which houses a modest 3,700 people. That show sold out and grossed nearly $53k for Gags. She came back seven months later and sold out three nights at Nokia Theatre, which houses 6,800. Her gross for each Nokia show was $314,893.33333333333you get the fucking point…

She played to twice the crowd size and gained six times the cash IN THE SAME CALANDER YEAR.

This is atrocious.

But let’s look at the totality of The Monster Ball extrapolating some idea from the box office data. First off, the chick worked her ass off and is planning on touring for a staggering 525 days. That’s 201 times she has to sing “Poker Face,” which is about how many times I had to hear it a day, so maybe that’s fair. Tack on all the press, awards shows, flying, and other promotional stuff she is doing between shows and you can be amazed at how someone can continue going without the use of cocaine.

Billboard gives us data on 46 shows from 40 arenas around the world. A total of 862,783 tickets out of a possible 877,641 were sold, a staggering 98% sales rate. Only 15 were not sold out and the total gross data is nearly $80 million. If we say these 46 shows are indicative of the entire tour, and I do because the data is collected from gigantic stadiums (Bell Center, Staples Center) as well as smaller venues (Scotiabank in Ottawa, UCF in Orlando) and I trust the sample data. If she made $78,249,973 over the course of those 46 shows, then that makes her total gross close to $302 million when she is done in May.

This means she made $16 million a month without factoring in promotion and royalties.

Holy shit, I’m exhausted just typing this out, and I’m not sure if I have a point, except to say this:

Ask more from our artists. Please don’t spend over $100 to see the same show you paid $30 for six months prior. More power to Lady Gaga if she is doing her job well and giving what her fans are asking for, but I know they aren’t asking to triple the amount of cash they spend on a concert during a recession.

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6 Responses to “Lady Gaga can die and go to hell”

  1. 03/22/2011 at 11:20 am

    you know way to much about her to not dig her/him ….

    • 3 Maz
      04/11/2011 at 1:49 am

      that only means he’s not being ignorant on the subject. Judging something you don’t know is a flaw. He’s just saying he’s actually done his homework to come to such a conclusion. So many writers/talking heads lack this skill these days.

  2. 04/05/2011 at 10:02 pm

    This whole article is really kind of mean and not very grounded in what it takes to make a show happen. Sure, she sold out Staples Center. She also ramped up the live act with a completely outrageous set and dancers. Whatever you don’t like about her, there is a group of people who will be attracted to it and, let’s face it, you probably don’t want these people next to you at the shows you love. So why don’t you lighten up?

    She’s staffing a huge amount of people to put up the set and has major expenses to keep the show going. A lot of that staff travels with her. If it pulls in money it’s because people like it. If people are watching her, it’s because they like her. She donates 20,000 to charity every show. She’s donated money to help people in Haiti and Japan or donated her services.

    I’ll bet if you met her or went to see her live, you might feel differently. Maybe that nerdy and mean monstrous part of you would be converted into a Little Monster because I can guarantee, she would embrace your inner freak in a heartbeat.

    You’re more than welcome to check out my coverage. I’m not her hugest fan or anything, but I felt like she was sincere about a great deal of what she does. http://www.examiner.com/rock-music-in-los-angeles/lady-gaga-s-birthday-monster-ball-at-staples-center

    • 04/06/2011 at 12:33 am

      I fully understand the time and effort it takes to put on a show, which you would know if you read my article.

      I’m praising her for everything you just wrote about (after I wrote about it), and ultimately i’m disappointed with the people who vote with their wallets…the fans.

      Which, again, I wrote.

      Oh, another thing:

      Please don’t use my site as promotion for your own, especially one you make money off of. It’s tacky.

    • 06/02/2011 at 3:08 pm

      Let’s be realistic. She isn’t staffing any of these people, that is her record company. Also, as much as it is a great thing that she is giving money to Haiti and Japan, it is still a good PR thing for her to do so (Hearts and Minds).

      Not to say that she isn’t working hard. I am sure she does, as any artist has to in order to make it big. Either way, he isn’t saying that she is wrong for doing what she does (in this case, the issue is with raising ticket prices in a bad economy.) He is saying that fans should ask for more out of an artist if they are going to pay three times more for a ticket than they did six months ago.

      On an aside, you can remove the links and such from her comment through the Dashboard. It is extremely tacky that you would advertise your own article on someone’s personal blog site.

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